imprisonment by over-strategizing
A page from Austin Kleon’s marvelous book, Keep Going.
The other night, on a walk with my husband and our pup, I had a realization.
When I play board games, especially resource-collection/engine-builder games, I often get stressed out about storing up money or items, planning ahead, figuring out five or ten or a dozen turns in advance and frying my brain trying to keep all the details straight and do everything in exactly the right order and get it all done before the end of the game...
As I thought of this, the pieces clicked into place in my mind as I then realized I do exactly that in real life too.
WOW. Daaaaamn. Mic drop moment for me.
We can't know, twenty turns or five years or six months in advance, exactly what is going to happen and how we're going to have things turn out. There are other people playing the game, too. Somebody might move to a square or take a card or resource you needed and ruin your whole play. There are external elements and situational circumstances and unexpected twists we can't possibly calculate for or see coming.
The only constant in life is change. Maybe something big will come along. Maybe we'll move or have a job change. Maybe we'll make a lot more money than we think we will, or a lot less. WE NEVER KNOW.
This frantic scarcity isn't how fun board games are meant to be played; strategizing until smoke is coming out of your ears can really suck all the joy out of the experience!
And I realize this can really suck the joy out of living, too.
It's just an aspect of my personality, but sometimes it exhausts me, and I really need to practice awareness and working with it instead of letting it overpower me. Holding onto dreams and ideas and hopes for the future with an iron fist, scrambling to figure out how every detail is going to stack up to gain the feeling of certainty... that's not the way. And it doesn't ensure my success or guarantees for what I want.
Fear is part of the bargain and always will be. We must learn to dance with the discomfort and unknowns. Take what’s handed to you and do the very best you can with it. Don’t rob yourself of the joyful, present experience of today because you’re too busy trying to add up what you’ll make happen in the future. Control is an illusion. (more on control, and it is a slippery slope)
I totally get how challenging this can be and how easy it is to forget, because it’s a struggle I come up against on a regular basis. We can do it, though! It’ll only make the game more fun and impactful. Happy playing… ❤️🎶♟️
