slippery slope
Control is a slippery slope.
When I get stressed and overwhelmed by all the things that cause me to feel stress and respond in stress, I tend to want to knuckle down, work harder to get through everything, and get it all done so I can reach a place of not feeling stressed anymore.
I have inherited a subconscious default mode to try to control the variables in my life and get them into ship-shape condition.
Just one problem.
We can’t control everything. Wouldn’t even feel good if we could.
OK, scratch that, two problems.
If we spend our whole lives chasing that point in the future where we believe we will no longer be stressed, everything will be orderly, awesome, and just as we want it, and all facets of our lives will be under control and going swimmingly…. then we will forever be chasing. That elusive point in time does not exist. Life won’t ever be free of all stress and challenge. There is always something. The challenge is the way. The imperfections are built in and unavoidable. The call for growth and change will lead us through our days and can only be followed by the willingness to embrace discomfort and hard work.
This means my default mode to knuckle down until I reach that stress-free, ideal place isn’t very effective and ultimately leads to burnout. We need rest. We can’t control everything, and life is always going to be a tricky balance, juggle, adventure, experiment… If I would let everything settle and choose to let it all go more often, all along the way, and practice enjoying the journey — even when (when, not if) some things aren’t going well or are totally unresolved or neglected — I could be a more well-rested, content, calm, stress-free individual. Right now! Not at some unknown time down the calendar. And the letting go, settling, choosing what I focus on, and resting will actually make me more effective and successful. You can’t pour from an empty cup and all that…
It probably goes without saying that being a more well-rested, less stressed, more joyful person is always preferred over the opposite, and I am practicing dealing with my fears, mindsets, beliefs, and responses so I can grow and improve and stay in the magic. (doing the hard things!)
Control is a slippery slope because once you start your efforts of trying to be in control, there’s no end to what else can fall onto your To Control list, like a snowball effect. Better to be light. Not my default mode, but I’m working on it.
